Purely Lady Dummy

Emo To To Post

2010-10-19T20:12:00.008+08:00

At the end of the post if you think that you wan to say something.. save it... cos I merely wanted to rant okay.. I dont need any comment.. Thank you.. It's my blog anyway... RIGHT ???

Lately, probably due to my hormone change 我变得很容易发火。。虽然我没有发给那令我嬲的人看和听不代表我不气。什么姐妹情。。我呸！！我时常跟自己说我的姐姐在很远我要好好的珍惜。虽然有时我很cool不代表我不关心，不在乎。有很多时候我不要理太多因为我自己没用没办法在金钱上帮到他们。。但如果他们又事的话我的心也一样紧张。。担心。

老妈常跟我说我们姐妹不多一定要好好的相处。有时候对他们好自己不要show出来。因为年纪的gap太大了。不会沟通吧。或者因为大家太爱脸了变得不会沟通。

看到自己的姐姐跟别人的感情好过自己。自己只可以做的是好好安慰自己。因为自己没用。。。不可以帮倒忙。

那天我在网上算八字。结果有提到我的兄弟，姐妹缘很薄。对父母也没什么尊重。我还记得以前我读过爸爸的一本风水书。也是这样说。。习惯了。。看透了。。不是我没尝试过。接受了。

有时候觉得跟朋友也是一样的。所以到最后我觉得靠自己是最好的。靠老公有时都可以吧。at least 当我走投无路的时候是他在我身边。。

突然间我觉得我没有了我两个姐姐。。。真可恶，可悲。。。。老妈，对不起了。。不是我不想做到姐妹情深。我需要做得已经做了。可能做到不够好吧。。但为什么每一次都是要最小的开始做先了。

小的就要先打电话问候，小的就要先叫人，小的就要先住口。小的就要听大的顽固道理吗？

闷。。。。。

Emo To To Post

2010-08-17T10:52:00.001+08:00

This post language/grammar will be total OUT. Do not proceed if you feel dizzy.. hahaha..

If you would have notice this blog contained limited photos. It was meant to be a place where I can rant and express out my feeling..

It's merely my personal feeling and has nothing related to anyone. So if you think that it's not relevant or wanted to comment please keep it to yourself like I've been keeping it to myself..

Lately, dont know since when I started to study a chinese "poet" called 弟子规。 It's actually been study widely in Chinese School.. I don't remember my school ever taught this kinda of stuff. But of cos they taught us "Pendidikan Moral", I still remember there's a play that I was a honest kid who returned back a wallet. Guess it did help, I seldom lied and I dont like to ppl to lie too. ahaks.... :P

But I've always like Chinese Culture, History and Values. Mom has very limited English background while Dad is Chinese educated. I've grown up listening to dad says.. "家和万事兴“，做人要守时，读得是自己的。and etc. I've always admired dad cos he's a very smart person just that he's can be very lazy at times. (I got it from him) While mom always remind us that our siblings are limit and we have to love each other. Have to be filial and etc.

I've always got this feeling that Chinese background people has more values. But of cos there are exceptional. and I am also english educated and I don't denied that I too DON'T HAVE much values - 价值观念. and 人情味 this is also the reason why I start to study 弟子规。 Altho it's always in the back of our mind that we should respect elderly, we should be filial and we should be this and that. Bu very often becos of egoism we lost it !! But of cos most people also 死爱脸吧。 And most people love be "bodek". it's undeniable...

什么忠情忠义is dad's beliefs. Dad's has 9 siblings but dad was given to my granddad's brother when he was young. Still dad's own brothers respect dad as the eldest. You know back in the good old days they like to give away kids, mom told me they almost gave me away to some cousin brother or to sister... lolxx..

Anyway, back in the good old days when my grand parent (Ah Gong & Ah Ma) was around. My uncles would come to our house during CNY to have re-union dinner otherwise my Ah Gong & Ah Ma will go to every uncle's house for re-union dinner. Those day it was so warm.

But of cos in each sibling they tend to have “心病“ but it's often throw behind cos 情义 always comes first. Mom always complaint about how my uncles depend on the family business.. how now the our cousin don't know how to respect my dad or their own dad. But whatever it is, things changed when I've become a parent. Everything must be throw behind, it's past. Why do we always have to hook on to the past and make our life miserable..

I've always been the rebellious one in the family and often made my mom 气死。 I've always the one that fight back mom ; always the one that has lack of patient and shout back when she nagged.. she often cried when I shout at her.. *sorry*.. but soon.. I realized that I shouldn't be doing that.. so now if she said something that I don't wan to listen I will change topic.. But she seems to be more open too.. sometimes I sound her for being too naggy she's okay with it..

To me... we don't know what will happen I've always prepared for the worst to happen but expecting the best. After being a mom myself... I have lotsa 忧虑 and 担懮 . 做人最重要是没有遗憾。要学会珍惜身边的人。

Farewell

2010-08-12T14:30:00.000+08:00

刚收到消息和我一起去做工四年多的“朋友-同事” 要离开了。。觉得很开心也很矛盾。哈哈哈。总之“天下无不散的宴席” 啦。我在想什么时候轮到我吧。

老公很喜欢我在这里做工。对他来说这里有很多福利，孩子看医生的钱可取回。看牙医也可。生孩子也可。

有了家庭就是这样吧，不舍得要改变因为活在自己的comfort zone了。虽然钱是不够用但是也要捱下去啦。。

希望明天会跟好吧。。。也祝她做工顺风，做工大吉。。哈哈哈。。。阿JAN'S LANGUAGE..

Do you believe

2010-08-05T11:15:00.000+08:00

What I believe ? hehehe... W.H.A.T ???

I think I read it somewhere... according to Feng Shui if we place flower in our bedroom it's likely to attracts "桃花“~Affairs. either the hubby or the wifey lah.. I dont really wan to believe it.. Perhaps it's coincident bah I remembered, during my wedding ceremony MIL suggested to have some fresh flower place in the room so that the room looks nicer. So I ordered some nice Gerbera and put in my room..

Perhaps I might be too sensitive, altho I was happily married then.. But I sense that the hubby is like somehow having an affair. I cant really remember much of it but somehow I always have a feeling that whenever I put some flower thingy in my room.. some upsetting stuffs will happen. There's a time when I went to Cameron and bought 2 plants back, MIL suggestion again. put in the room. and Terrible things happen again !!.. Even bedsheet with Flower also got terrible things happen. "Takan" so coincident rite ??

Anyway I dont feel comfortable with it.. so in order to have peace in mind for MYSELF.. i tried to prevent putting flowery thingy in the room. Sometimes, I so wanted to put some nice flowery sticker on my sliding door.. but I cant.. huhuhu.. Owh .. and I am very honest with the hubby .. I told him.. whenever I put flower thingy in the room.. I'll be prepared you'll be naughty.. hahahaha..

Nag or Hate

2010-07-06T15:08:00.000+08:00

When I was in my teenage years, I like to locked myself in the room.. It's to hide away from my mom's naggings. Or rather to hide myself from being ask to do things.. I always feel that my mom is super naggy and long winded.. she seems so 烦~annoying.

As I grew older and came to KL to study then to work, I'd went back occassionally but still I would prefered to go out with my friends then to stay home listening to her "grandmother's stories" and her complaints. Then I met my bf now hubby, his mom was a very nice lady. She's seldom at home cos spend most of her time in Singapore working. It's just left me and my hubby at home. She pampered us alot and she will buy things back for us everytime she comes back from Singapore.

I never had any hard feeling towards her but still there are rivalry between us as we compete for one man's attention (her son, my hubby). I presume this is normal for a family that only have one son and moreover a divorcee. I often give in cos I ought to respect elderly eventho I dont look like a person that would. wakakaka... Altho she is a very easy-going person but being a woman, she tend to nag too (even I would, sometimes). I've run away from my naggy mom and landed myself to a naggy MIL. Altho she doesnt nag alot but I'd hate it when she nags that I am untidy, I dont follow up on things, I dont put back things to where it belongs and I am irresponsible so to said. I feel that she will never ever be grateful to what I do.

As long as I am under her roof I ought to listen to what she says that's my theory. It's actually like never ending story and it's ever meant to be MIL & DIL rivalry. Anyhow, I will be other's ppl MIL one day.. and I hope I wont turn out to be a grumpy old woman. When my mom meet my MIL, she said that my MIL is a very easy going person and it's good for me.. but mom would feel that my relation is better with MIL then to her.

Now perhaps it's 相见好,同居难. People that we dont met often we usually will think they are better but when we starts to live together, there may be problems arise. That's the nature I think.

Lots of my friend usually think that I am very bossy. I am very fierce and demanding. But I had to admit that when at home, I still have to listen to the MIL says. I know that staying together under one roof we need to communicate which I admit that I didnt. So this person dont know wat the other person thinking and vice versa. I dont like to express my feeling out to my family.. So when the MIL nagged I either swallowed it or ignored it.. Perhaps bcos we never communicate we tend to assume too much..

haizh.. i got to stop ... cos I am quite blur on what's this topic all bout already .. till another ranting again... Adios !!.

莫生气

2010-07-01T09:23:00.000+08:00

人生就像一场戏,
因为有缘才相聚.
相扶到老不容易,
是否更该去珍惜.
为了小事发脾气,
回头想想又何必.
别人生气我不气,
气出病来无人替.
我若气死谁如意,
况且伤神又费力.
邻居亲朋不要比,
儿孙琐事由它去.
吃苦享乐在一起,
神仙羡慕好伴侣.

Out of Blue

2010-06-18T15:06:00.000+08:00

Just got back from a 2 hours karaoke session with my office's fren.. I felt so damn old and damn out-dated already .. hahahaha.. While my 2 other fren who are older then me singing all the "current song" I sit back and stare at the screen.

Does married and having kids make us old ?? Lolxx.. depending how much commitment I put into my family bah.. When I have Ervin I dont feel I am out-dated yet.. but then I have Elyse.. calling frens is like a shock to them.. they'll ask me if I am doing direct sales or selling insurances.. hahahaha...

It really needs lotsa energy to keep up to date... and not forget to mention needs lotsa "bullets~money" too.. Just dont look at other ppl, I myself is turning myself into a 'old' woman.. Work, Cook and Care.. what else ??

When some of my frens are still enjoying their life with fren clubbing and partying even they have kids.. I slowly have to accept the fact that I cant keep up anymore.. Altho I can still dance.. but its so alien already .. seems like those moves has become alien dance to the youngster nowadays.. wahakakakakaka..

It's should be a happy Friday today but the lack of sun or perhaps due to PMS has made me Blue out of sudden. I felt so tired.. perhaps sleeping late last nite did contribute to this feeling.. bah.. suddenly i felt so blue.. *yawn**

Meaning of Marriage

2010-06-03T11:18:00.000+08:00

What's the meaning of marriage to the people today leh ?? Seriously.. I couldnt answer.. but I considered myself as a conservative woman (I presume.. cos I dont belif in 男女平等~Men-Women Samex2) I am just a 小女人.. When things happens 3 years back... I wanted to walk out of the marriage with my big tummy.. But at last I gave in cos he changed.. he asked for second chance.. so I told myself.. I dont get married to get divorced aftermath. Moreover, he was my choice.. I've choosen him to be with him.. and he choose to come back .. let's give it a try.. Luckily, God has pity on me and him and my baby bah...

The last trip back to hometown, I got a new from my fren saying this bestfriend (BFF) of mine has some problem in her marriage.. She left the hubby and her daughter to stay with her lover. Seriously, its nothing new in the society already.. she said.. she is not happy with his hubby and she is stressed up by her family.. It's her dad that threaten her into this marriage.. Cos her dad like this guy but she doesnt want to married this guy so her dad decided to "runaway fr home".. *so dramatic~ it's real life story** It made her no choice but to get married.. she said.. she wasnt happy during her wedding.. till then.. she was preggie then she had to stayed home to take care the kid.. perhaps she gone a bit bonker later on becos of it bah..

INitially, the hubby has got a cyber cafe.. has be a boss all the time.. perhaps due to the economic he has to close down his shop bah.. So he went to my fren's shop to help out lor.. but her parent of cos.. would sound mah.. the hubby has turn sour.. no more value.. hahaha.. then.. both my fren and his hubby starts to quarrel.. and she starts to look for alternative "enjoyment" ?? hahaha.. which is already expected.. so this time.. she ranaway from home.. not the dad !!.. I presume.. what happen aftermath.. we can all guess jor.. cos it's nothing new..

So who is the victim ?? the hubby ?? my BFF ?? NO !!!.. It's her little daughter... I'd did ask my BFF .. if she loves her hubby ?? she didnt answer me.. I personally thought she is spoilt.. she's a brat.. and she's still living in her childhood i.e naive.. Or perhaps she is brave, she's bold for standing up to her rights.. bah !!..

knowing her since childhood I always thinks that she is lucky jor just that she is really stubborn and never admit her fault.. or perhaps it's really her parent that made her wat she is today.. I dont know how to judge and dont wat to comment more.. *I have a daughter.. I dont wan to talk bad about ppl.. i scared of karma.. ***

Likewise, if I am her... pampered by parent and hubby .. have nice house and car.. I would be grateful and appreciate jor.. BUT seriously.. I wouldnt wan her parent to be mine lah .. hahahah.. so now she is happily staying with the lover, recommencing on going to pub and eating "happy pills"... the last i heard frm my fren , he told me she was detained by police and was "jamin" after..

Simple Dimple

2010-06-01T15:57:00.000+08:00

守得云开见月明.. 3 years back I had a very very bad experience finally today I saw the silver lining. Is it bcos I have changed or he have changed ?? The answer is we both changed...

Some people may say I am stupid and brainless.. I dont blame them.. if he is wrong for once and we never give chance I wont be seeing silver lining today eh ?? Who knows what will happen only God knows.. I belief in God...

Smart people often have high expectation, I dont know if it's becos they've been pampered or they've be spoilt or simply it's becos they have that luck.. I always belief that "Lady Luck" wont be near us forever.. There are always Ups and Downs ... Good Luck and Bad Luck.. We should be grateful when "Lady Luck" is with us.. hence she'll always be with us cos we are grateful and appreciate her..

What happens when "Lady Luck" go away from us.. We keep faith lor.. when one door is shutted, God will always keep a small window for us mah.. This is how optimistic I am.. since 3 years.. hahaha.. Altho sometimes I may not be as optimistic.. but when I think back .. there are lots more ppl who are more unfortunate then me.. I shall bounce back..

At my age, what do I look forward too ?? Simple and Happy life.. As long as the people around me are SAFE and SOUND I could request for more.. When they are happy I am happy too... It's the Happy Energy flowing around yet ?? hahahaa...

When u asked me.. What happen if the tragedy repeats again ? hahahahaha.... I dont even wan to think about it yet.. Cos it' hasnt happen lor.. Why bother to think so much ....

Kids make us tension... I have tension when my kid doesnt listen to me.. He just doesnt want to keep all his toys back .. even I threaten to cut myself.. (LMAO)... I think he thought that his mom is crazy .. at 3 year old.. you think he understand ?? even a 30 years old oso couldnt be bother lah ... so the best things is to IGNORE , IGNORE and IGNORE... he doesnt keep it.. THROW it lor... then ?? BUY AGAIN ar ?? ya lah.. OLD one dont go.. where got NEW one ??

Sound like very spendthrift hor... another way is .. keep it.. store it in the cupboard.. then.. wat happen ?? bring it out as a new toys lor............. to a 3 y/o we can do this.. to a 30 y/o leh ?? he hasnt reach that year yet.. I dont think so far first.. later pening !..

Conclusion is.. Altho I am Brainless and LAzy.. but I am happy ... cos I am Contented....

My Life

2010-05-20T16:04:00.000+08:00

I think I blogged before that I am the youngest in the family... And being the youngest one, I am very pampered by my eldest sister as well as my mother... As far as I can remember I always fight with my second sister and ever hated her before.. But as I've grown I started to cheerish them.. I remembered that my second sister also hated me before.. Cos becos of me, she often gor beaten by my eldest sister who's forever protective over me.

My parent sells satay for living, they dont only sells satay.. Dad was a keysmith and fish tackle seller.. they runs the shop in the afternoon and sells satay at night.. Before they started this business, they used to sell fishes and birds at the same time still sell satay.. So shall I say .. SaTAY is our "bread-provider"... lolxxx.. Mom was a very hardworking and thrify woman altho she could be very naggy at the same time.. We dont come from a very poor nor a very RICH family but I admit that I did have a very healthy and happy childhood.. Probably because, I am grateful for what I have and never expecting anything MORE.. Perhaps also I inherited my dad's genes of being a "happy go lucky" or rather.. 今天有酒, 今天醉 attitude... (today got wine, today drunk)

This kind of attitude often trigger arguement in the family and also comments from relatives... hahahaha. Mom always complaint that dad always "itchy body" when got money.. *dont get me wrong*... Dad was a good man, altho he does go to Hadyai.. lolxxx.. but I am sure he always return home.. and mom was okay with it.. hahahaha... my dada will always use the money to buy unneccessary stuffs when he got money... So we grew up.. always listening to mom's complaint and nagging...

I used to stay at home with my 2nd sister while my parent have to sell satay till late midnite. We always have fight... but seriously I enjoyed it .. I love pestering and disturbing her.. hahaha... then later, she left to KL for studies.. I was all alone at home, I only help my parent in the weekend.. Sometimes, I would tried to escape from helping them by telling them I need to study.. lolxx.. I always locked myself in the room... Listen to song.. Dance.. Sleep and DREAM ... hahahaha..

Once a while when my 2nd sister come back we'll still argue and fight.. I still remember that one day.. while we were sitting there.. making satay... she was bla bla bla.. and i fight her words... she twisted my ear.. and from there I started to tell her how I felt.. and I think she also felt bad too... and from that day.. we were "soul mate".. lolxx.. but not for long.. wakakakaka.... as for my eldest sister.. before I could remember.. she already flown to Holland and seldom come back ... When she comes back, she'll buy me lotsa stuffs... and pampered me like princess.. at the same time have to "fuk si" her bf... lolxxx..

I couldnt remember since when I started to be mature... or did I ever grew mature all the while.. hahaha.. but.. when I look back at my life during my teenage years... I was considered very lucky ... and happy.. eventho.. I have a very control-freak mom... a very naggy mom... a very *ppl used to say useless but I DONT THINK HE IS USELESS* dad.. owh boy i think my dad is cool and smart..... a very medium family...

If you asked me,

Are you sad that you need to help your parent to carry stuff in the morning market in the weekend ?

Are you sad that you have to sit there hours and hours helping your parent "cucuk"- poke satay everyday even after you come back from school ?

Are you sad that when your sister left you only to help your parent here ?

..... and many more.....

I am not sad.. I am grateful that I CAN DO IT... !!!

**dont ask me wat this post is all about.. COS I ALSO DONT KNOW***... it's a puzzle.. more of this kinda post will be coming...

Beh Tahan

2010-05-03T20:42:00.000+08:00

I dont know since when this blog has been a place for me to rant ... perhaps it's because it doesnt have much reader in this blog and I thought it should be save.. hahaha..

Today I wanted to rant bout a relative.. hahaha.. I think I'd complaint bout them before.. but not too sure if it's in written or just plain complaining to friends nia.. haha...

This wifey is a super cerewet woman.. i meant which women are not cerewet rite ?? but this one is super.. Imagine, this woman have to stick her whole panty with pad during her menstrual.. and i heard that she uses different type of diapers for her baby... in a day... well.. all other i am not too sure.. i just type wat i heard nia.. and whenever they travel back to their hometown.. i think she 'd actually almost "angkut" the whole house back ler...

So this pair of new parent are coming for a visit.. and their precious son needed the 'salong' to sleep and coincidently the hub has dismantle the whole salong... the whole meant into pieces... so.. they wanted it to install back just for that 1 nite... but of cos if they want it to be install.. her hubby would hv to do the job lah... else ?? expect mine ?? hmph !!... anyway.. since their visit is based on "everyone invitation" ... perhaps... they shall be the king, queen and prince of the day bah....

which i dont really bother bout them.. what's that bother me is that my little boy really adore them.. nabeh.. i really wanted to vomit blood jor... slowly i accepted the fact that the more i dislike something.. the more my loves one will do it.. what can i do but to close my eyes..

sometimes i really felt so damn depressed with ppl around me.. but still life goes on.. cos if i'd this feeling.. other ppl has it too.. wtf... why do i always hv to care park wat ppl's feelings...

no wonder this fews day my hormone is like gone haywire and i wanted so much to scold ppl.... darn... self controlling is damn ...... suffering....

seriously i dont know wtf i m typing jor.. so long... wtf..wtf.. wtf...

A note for Myself

2010-04-21T11:37:00.000+08:00

This is worth reading...

A simple man tells how his booking an air ticket
for his father, his first flight, brought emotions
and made him realize that how much we all take for
granted when it comes to our parents.

My parents left for our native place on Thursday
and we went to the airport to see them off. In fact,
my father had never traveled by air before, so I
just took this opportunity to make him experience the
same. In spite of being asked to book tickets by
train, I got them tickets on Lufthansa.

The moment I handed over the tickets to him, he
was surprised to see that I had booked them by air.
The excitement was very apparent on his face, waiting
for the time of travel. Just like a school boy, he was
preparing himself on that day and we all went to
the airport, right from using the trolley for his
luggage, the baggage check-in and asking for window
seat and waiting restlessly for the security check-in
to happen.

He was thoroughly enjoying himself and I, too, was
overcome with joy watching him experience all these
things.

As they were about to go in for the security
check-in, he walked up to me with tears in his eyes
and thanked me. He became very emotional and it was
not as if I had done something great but the fact that
this meant a great deal to him.

When he said thanks, I told him there was no need
to thank me.

But later, thinking about the entire incident, I
looked back at my life.

As a child how many dreams our parents have made
come true. Without understanding the financial
situation, we ask for football, dresses, toys,
outings, etc. Irrespective of their affordability,
they have satisfied to all our needs. Did we ever
think about the sacrifices they had to make to
accommodate many of our wishes?

Did we ever say thanks for all that they have done
for us?

Same way, today when it comes to our children, we
always think that we should put them in a good school.
Regardless of the amount of donation, we will ensure
that we will have to give the child the best, theme
parks, toys, etc.. But we tend to forget that our
parents have sacrificed a lot for our sake to see
us happy, so it is our responsibility to ensure that
their dreams are realized and what they failed to see
when they were young, it is our responsibility to
ensure that they experience all those and their life
is complete.

Many times, when my parents had asked me some
questions, I have actually answered back without
patience. When my daughter asks me something, I have
been very polite in answering. Now I realize how they
would have felt at those moments.

Let us realize that old age is a second childhood
and just as we take care of our children, the same
attention and same care need to be given to our
parents and elders.

Rather than my dad saying thank you to me, I would
want to say sorry for making him wait so long for this
small dream. I do realize how much he has sacrificed
for my sake and I will do my best to give the best
possible attention to all their wishes. Just because
they are old does not mean that they will have to give
up everything and keep sacrificing for their
grandchildren also. They have wishes, too.

Take care of your parents .

Rude

2010-02-24T14:46:00.000+08:00

How do you define it ?? A fren of mine defined my son as RUDE... and I wasnt very happy about it. What makes her said that my son is RUDE ?? hey .. this is the story :-

She brought her 16 months old daughter to my hse and the kids was playing and my son was very actively playing too.. shouting and running and jumping and talkative like usual.. he was doing all the things the kids would do lah.. Then he was riding his bike and he's been told to be careful and not to simply bang ppl however being ever mischevious he did it softly to her daughter.. and she claims that my son poke her daughter very hard and scared her..

WTF ?? is this call rude ?? hmm... she told me that, not all kids are like that lor.. at least her daughter would listen and when she "tarn" her she will scare lah.. and she said that... well at least now i know that my daughter is not THAT NAUGHTY !!..

WTF x 2.. hahahaha.. What should I say ??

Furious..

2010-01-29T16:53:00.000+08:00

I was damn angry and furious today.. I really very angry with the way the MIL treated my son.. it's my SON.. god damit... okay... I dun need you to always "tum" him and pleases him..

there is a saying "pang ha chut hao chi" ~ 旁下出孝子。 I dont know whether is that the right character.. but if you know mandarin i m sure u know wat i am talking bout.. does any mommy out there agreed with this method??

Well at least I was brought up that way and i never hated my mom for doing so.. cos at least i know how to scare of her..

Mom always play the bad / wicked woman role.. always the one that scold and cane the kids... and then.. the kids will eventually hate us and avoid us.. but we are actually trying to teach and educate the right way ??

I am damn farking angry when I was here teaching and scolding my kid and there are other ppl there trying to protect them.. I DARN F**KING HATE IT.. what do you mean the kids need to "tum"~ pujuk is called what in english I dont know !!... "tum" until.. climb up head lah ??? damn .... i shouldnt have come home so early and see how .. they .. park !!!.... grhhhh.... i am damn damn damn damn furious NOW !!!

The Challenge

2010-01-15T15:31:00.000+08:00

It's not even the Year of Tiger yet and I can feel that the warning of a tough year ahead of me. I dont know why I have this kind of thinking and I kept telling myself not to be so .... negative .. ouch !! It's bad Qi.. bad bad Qi.. lol...

I knew I have to kept my mouth shutted... yet i didnt.. so what have I got myself into.. a big pool of shit.. wakakakaka... Apparently, I shouldnt be so serious.. infact I am not at all.. Cos this job has been assigned to me.. I think I should kept my bloody mouth shutted again and JUST DO IT !!..

Being in this kinda "multi-national" company which is not so multi.. It's really tough that in an event to please every "tom,dick and harry" huh... For the past 3yrs.. the organiser for our company dinner or our family trip has been our.. #1 type of ppl.. hm.. (god knows who).. they tend to do it like how they themselves enjoyed it. and our #2 type of ppl doesnt really enjoy it at all.. therefore; they somehow or rather felt a bit "double standard".. But as much as we are.. We #3 also doesnt quiet like their arrangement but yet we are 1Malaysia mah.. so .. "apa-apa lah".. hahahaha.. Infact to me.. it's really "whatever"... as long as I with these ppl or as long as we have life to be with these ppl is "enough jor"... This is Janice.. hahaha..

okay.. so this time round. thanks to my mouth I have to start sourcing for "entertainment" hahahaha.. which hopefully could suits everyone and this is the MOST DIFFICULT tasks.. To be fair.. I personally thought that it's time to do it the #2 way.. But I dont think the #1 ppl would like it.. ai ai ai .. very very ... frustating arr..

I shall now.. Close my Eye, Close my Ear and Close my MOUTH

What is the purpose ..

2010-01-11T15:18:00.001+08:00

I start to ponder what is the purpose of this blog created at the first place. ha... it was supposed to be the purified (NO SX, NO BULLSHIT, NO FOUL Language) blog from my other blog.. hehe..

But Now i start to wonder if I should actually delete this blog.. It's seems to me that the blogging frenzy is no longer in me.. hahaha..

看不起...

2009-10-15T11:58:00.000+08:00

很多时候人家看不起你或者取笑 .. 你会怎样呢???　如果人家看不起你．．　你千万不要看不起知己．．．．　　你要相信这个世界有报应．．．　　如过没报那是应为，　时间没到．．．　　　　

Transition period

2009-10-12T15:46:00.000+08:00

Ever work in a joint operated company where there are 2 different culture.. ?? 1 : lazy and slow ; 2 : polite and humble.. hahahaha... I tell u .. it's a cultural shock.. been working wif my boss for 3 years now.. I remembered I was the first chinese who entered this company.. then gradually it increased to.. er.. about 10 chinese.. yup.. sorry to say it's really bias... those kiasuism thinking in #1. and god knows wat...

my boss is #2 type of person.. tht's is why i've been selected to work in this company at the first place.. cos he dont wan to hire #1 type of person.. to help balance the company kut.. hahahaha.. watever it is.. I am here to work and to earn a living. Over the 3 years, they havent been giving any bonus and somehow some of my chinese or even #1 type of colleagues wasnt feeling happy at all... All are waiting for "THE DAY TO COME".. but when the GM changed.. everything changed too.. not to better but to even WORST.. he would only be in da office 3-4 days in a MONTH.. yes you read me rite.. in a month.. so wat did he do.. ?? travel lor.. MC lor.. business trip lor.. (typical malai sian arrr..)..

the contract term for 5 years has come to an end.. the current #1 type of GM will be changed to #2 .. all 2gether wif all the managers.. including mine.. so my boss will changed from #2 type to #1.. *wish me luck*... as a malaisian.. of cos.. by rite it should not be a problem cos I speaks their language... LOL... however, i got a feeling things going to be hard lor.. my current boss asked me to request for a change wif the other staff at the same position.. LOL.. talk is so easy for him..

This transition period of cos is scaring so many ppl especially us (the chinese).. well of cos other mayb doing something to secure their pants as well.. who knows wat is going to happen after this months.. Yup.. exactly, this month shall be the last month i am gng to see my boss.. owh.. will i hug this chubby polar bear.. hehehe??? dunno !!..

Honestly, I tot I am okay wif the current situation. And I've been minding my own business, and I seldom go around talking to everyone.. except some who are really close to me.. hahahaha.. well I am still a woman okay... most of the time i will stay in my cubicle.. browsing for infors.. writing stuff like this and on FB.. LOL .. so .. of cos i m scared.. I have lotsa debts to pay... okay .. I really hope that my future boss will be as nice as my current one.. ... can someone help me pray !! ?? LOL !!!..

So RAndom

2009-09-28T12:18:00.000+08:00

It's a very random post in conjunction wif the current weather (raining).. hahaha.. *emo mood*... Apparently, I tot the SUMMER (HOT, HOT, HOT) is on da way.. (ahaks.. of cos I knew Msia donch have SUMMER.. dew).. cos the ants are crawling all over my bathroom's sink.. Well, that is normally how i tell the weather.. hehehe.. else I will be having difficult in breathing if it's turning to cold weather.. Weather detector Janice ?? hahaha.. watever !..

The Raya mood has made me became abnormal i think.. for the past weekends.. i've been have mixed feeling, mixed mood and sometimes I felt so retarded !!.. hahaha.. I spent most of my time hooked up to the computer playing FV.. farming and farming.. hahaha.. (no life..sad life) When other ppl spent their holiday back in Hometown I was stucked here in KL.. eat eat eat... din really enjoy it.. Cos i've been dreaming lots bout my mom.. well, at least 2 times.. strange.. dun ask me wat about the dreams.. cos I dont have a clear pictures of it.. Called mom and mom told me that her legs are very numb after got back from KL.. and start thinking superstitious stuffs.. While, I know I have to do something bout it.. but yet.. I felt very reluctant and tired.. Perhap I have to wait till the sky drop or wait till the rain stop only I will start doing any necessary stuffs like gng back to hometown .. hahaha.. or wait till my mood is ready to talk to the hubby telling him i wanna go home and see my mom.. hahahaha..

No one to blame.. but me, myself and I.. I can only control myself ... dew..

Is it too difficult ?? Just get a bus and head right home .. HA !!.. Neah .. it's not difficult at all.. well, if I am all alone.. Now that I am a mother and married woman/wife and a daughter/niece and a working person... I felt that i am so farking pathetic, that I have responsibilities to my kids, the hubby, my parents, my friends, my family members and my work. hahaahaha.. not too much on work actually.. But the office is where i earn moolah to be a responsible person !!.. NO ?? dew !!..

Apparently, I dont look like how i think.. ahaha.. ppl would think that I am a control-freak.. controlling the house-hold.. infact lotsa women nowadays wanted to be dominant.. while me.. I considered myself a still-yet-not-so tradisional person.. wtf !!.. hahaha.. there are lotsa times I wouldnt wan to think and argue/defend anything.. like the saying "If you cant change something, change the way you look at it.. "... (I told you this post is so random, I donch know wtf it's all bout after all.. ) Anyway, conclusion on what i would like to stress it.. I am so fark up stress when my mom told me that she is not feeling well and I had dreams and I cant go back and see her.. cos I have to wait till the right timing.. FART & DEW !... Sometimes, I wonder... Why the Fark it's only me ... it's only me HERE ALONE.. just as if like the hubby is the ONLY SON to his mom.. WTF !!..

Wife and Mother

2009-09-17T14:57:00.000+08:00

Was chatting wif my best friend over the phone yesterday, she was saying..

"You all married woman wif kiddos ar.. kenot be bit more independant wan wor.. always need ppl to drive around wan wor.. my sis like dat , ah V like that.. " ..

so I answered her.. "I'll see YOU the next time when you are a mother and wife.. YOu better make sure you "charng hei".. okay.. "

she said.. "I will hire maid lor"

I said.. " Yeah .. YOu Better.. Dun "sui pei yan tai" ~ dun let ppl look down on ya.. YOU MUST CHARNG HEI OKAY.. "

I was raising my voice in anger when I said that .. cos no one would ever understand.. well maybe.. To some ppl I am trying to give excuse.. why who and so can do it and why cant you ?? COS I AM NOT THEM.. We are different person.. ..

" Why U cant go yourself meh ??

Why U cant ask him (the hubby) to send meh ??

Why U must bother me leh??? "

and soon when there are so many WHYS.. the relationship starts to wreck.. There no longer asking favours.. No more communication, where there are, communication breaks down.. hahahaha...

I told my best fren " If got Hair who wanna be baldie" ??? she said I am giving excuse.. hahahaha.. well, if that's the comment I accept.. How I wish I can have my freedom to go anywhere and do watever I wanted to.. Now I dont only have to think about the Hubby but the most important have to think bout the kiddos.. What so difficult to bring the children out ?? Paying visit to ppl.. ask your hubby to send you lah ??

Sad to say.. if the hubby is not grunting and happily said Yes.. then no problem liao .. we can go anywhere, anyone's house.. no problem.. BUt out of 10 guys hor.. there are only ONE guy that are willing to drive the wife around.. be it to her fren's house or the relative house.. but that only one guys will ever NOT be MY GUY.. wakakakakakaka...

Sometimes, it's really difficult to please so many people.. When there's a heart, there's a will.. but then there are kiddos everything is difficult.. It's always easy for ppl to say .. so when we cant change the fact how ppl think... we change the way we see it lor.. hahahahahaha...

DARN !!

2009-09-10T12:05:00.001+08:00

I Have not use this sentences for at least ONE YEAR ... hahaha.. I WAN TO DIET !!.. hahaha 我要减肥 !!.. For the past one year till date.. I've been indulging myself into FOOD FOOD and more FOODssss.. ahahaha.. imagine me having 2 pcs of ROTI TELUR.. ahahah.. that's wat i call FAT !!..

My excuse for me being so uncontrollable is.. ME IS ~~BREASTFEEDING~~ BreastPUMPING.. ahaha I need more food to produce more energy and milk ... hahaha.. Lame excuse.. but tell me who can say no to "GOOD AND NICE FOODS"...

I shall start my diet plan in no time.. and hopefully i will success.. yesterday, while i go thru my camera.. I saw a picture that my boy took while i wan busy in da kitchen.. owh my GOD !!.. whn i saw myself i really felt like suiciding !!.. Wat a fat PIG i have turned myself into.. blame it all to myself.. my frens has been telling me that I am FAT.. but yet. I dont care.. wakakakaka... Hopefully, I may control myself again !!.. gosh !!.. it's really hard to resist those food.. MIL's bf is coming next weekend over the RAya Hols.. we shall be out looking for good food to eat liao .. how to control ??.. u tell me lah .. aiyo!!>.

beh tahan..

2009-09-01T12:12:00.000+08:00

it seems to be a very common word that we said everyday... but recently due to a radio station, now we almost heard it like "eating vege" liaoo.. hahahaha...

back to the actual topic bah... over the weekend while ppl are celebrating their national day. I am stucked at home wif my gal and my mom.. I thought I would have some Peace and Quiet and chilling wif my dear princess and my empress.. My gal falls sick on saturday.. and my ears has becomes soar since then.. Luckily, there are doctor on Sunday, otw I wud have to admit my poor daughter just to kept all the PEOPLE's mouth SHUTTED !!.. According to doctor, she has got viral fever (more infor) and he expect her to have fever on and off for 3 days. Well, the due day is today, hopefully she will be fine by today.

Thanks to the stupid H1N1 and so many other stupid virus ... I already expected they will be extra worried. While they are worried, does that means I am NOT ?? I dont like to listen to nagging, I dont like explaining when I am worried.. BUT ... one call after another really pissed me OFF and we had a drama over the phone on saturday nite.. DARN !!... even yesterday evening, the fever came back again and... my ears starts to soar again !!.. DAMN IT.. DAMN THE STUPID VIRUS !!.. CAN YOU ALL PLEASE DONT BE SO OVER_REACTING please !!!.. it's doesnt make the situation good.. okay.. it's make me BOILED !!..

Perhaps it's my problem.. I dont have patient talking to .. naggy person... serious !!>. DAmn it !!..

Everything

2009-08-19T16:34:00.000+08:00

The more I look at the UK webby, the more I fell in love with the country .. wakakkakaka.. Simply bcos the stuff there are so ... nice and cant get it here in Malaysia.. and I've mentioned it and I dun feel bored to say it again ... They've got CAR-BOOT sale.. selling dirt cheap TOYS.. that's still in GOOD CONDITION... now wonder our "malai tong pao" start shipping in those toys to sell it here..

THose toys that I brought back from my previous trip still in good use.. ahahah.. well except the lil bunny.. tht's not functioning anymore probably cos Ervin was too agressive wif it.. Now.. Elyse dun get a chance to play wif it liao.. :(

Arghh.. I want.. TAtty Teddy !!!.. hahahahahaha...

Who's fault ?

2009-08-18T12:07:00.000+08:00

This morning my BMF called me and told me, he might be divorcing his wife. Cos his wife is cheating on him... errr.. yeah .. but who to blame leh ?? Cant judge.. cos his lucky hasnt been good after marrying his wife that he's been wif since secondary school. When we were still schooling, he's been very in love wif his wife and he pampered her very much. When they argue, he would rather hurt himself then to say break-off.. Very often I told him, why wouldnt you choose me ?? hahaha.. he used to tell me that he felt unsecure wif me.. wakakaka..

hahaha.. guess now he regretted huh !! From wat he told me over the past year.. things hasnt been good, he's been changing job from one to another. I dont know.. simply because he cant get along wif all the other colleagues. He tried setting up his own business but things werent good afterall..

he told me probably cos the auspicious date and time were messed up during their wedding date.. So I told him.. why not you guys go for a divorce and then re-married again.. mind you guys.. they have got 2 kids now.. When he told me this morning, well.. i didnt got shocked but i felt for the 2 kids.. What actually went wrong ?? is it really the so called "auspicious timing and date" or they really shouldn't be together ?? He's been working so hard.. but things just dun get right on his career that lead to the insecurity of the wifey !!.. The wifey has been a good financial controller.. and i felt for his mom too.. He is the only child, but still needs his mom support very often .. haizh .. LUCK hasnt been on his side for very long time !!!.. Who's fault ?? I cant judge ler..

China Maid

2009-06-17T09:40:00.000+08:00

If there are going to have China Maid coming in.. there will be more jokes like this !!!.. wakakakaka...

you are doesnt mean other is

2009-06-10T15:04:00.000+08:00

I m not calculative, I m not selfish, if I can offer help.. I will and I m not stingy.. but doesnt mean that other ppl are the same as me !!!.. sometimes it's hard to ask for someone for things.. It's okay.. I dun even think that I would get anything from you, when I ask you.. I would rather spend more ... or not having it at all then you ask you ever..

life is a drama

2009-06-03T09:14:00.000+08:00

What happen if you broke off with your bf and.. u discovered that you are preggie .... and u want the child but not the bf ???

How would u react ??

How come life is so dramatic when we least expected ???? *sigh !!!...

when i am stress

2009-05-22T11:55:00.000+08:00

I wish that I can go somewhere no one knows me and chilled

It's something really common for a stress person looked for. Or even look up the sky and admire the clouds.. wahahaha..

How marriage and being a mother changed me ?:-

I became more hardworking.. hahaha.. waking up early to settle my 2 ~~monsters~~ angels then bring them around. No more sleeping late. haizh ..
I reduced my vulgar words usage at home.. hahaha..
I am such a bored person now.. as if I dont have life FOR MY OWN.. hahaha..
Other then being with my kids.. I felt lazy dealing with all the people around me.. I no time f*** my hubby !!.. hahahaha (dun be so dirty, not that f***) hahaha..
I starts to appreciate my parent more.. hahaha..
I lost some of my temperamental, I said some..
I became so clean freak hahaha.. sometimes .. but having a newborn at home I dun wan those dusts flying around lor. (Clean and Tidy is 2 different things.. )

There are some more.. but I cant really figure what are those.. anyway, it's hard to be wat I used to... No wonder, some ppl said they just dont wan to grow up.. hahahaha.. I wish I am lil' Elyse now.. wahahaha... uwawawawa...

Owh yeah .. When I am STRESS... I type/talk RUBBISH.. otherwise.. I would love to sit home ALONE and do my HOUSE WORK and SLEEP !!.. ahahahaha... YES.. i m stresss now !!..

my long lost fren

2009-05-20T16:40:00.000+08:00

Today while walk back from lunch, I bumped into one of my college frens. He gave me his namecard and asked me to email him. And so I went back and email him and we kinda chat via msn liao. Well, based on his outfit and the person next to him we can tell that he is gay..

He replied my email telling me that I changed lots as in FAT.. and he is still single and told me wat happened to him after college. We exchanged our msn and start chatting.. we used to be closed.. I dont know how i forgot.. but being direct and he is open with me i asked him if he likes boy or gal.. he replied me that he is 100% gay.. openly.. I was happy that he was open and dare to admit it. I dun discriminate gays okay.. I love friending with them, they are cool altho sometimes can be a lil bithcy !!. ahahahaha...

So he told me he's been honest to his parent bout his 'preference' ?? and his parent is okay with it.. he told me alot of his stuffs and how he's been looking for me.. hahaha.. Ironicly, i too miss and remember him after so many year. it's bout 10 yrs.. hehehe..

It's fate bah .. that brought us back.. hehehe.. so happy to found my long lost "Cool" fren..

Shoulder Ache..

2009-05-16T21:28:00.000+08:00

It's a sign of old aged liao.. or perhap the burden on the shoulder is heavier now.. Having said that I am still spending on credit cards like a duchess (did i spell it rite ??) okay lah.. like a "datin" lah... I wud blame it on the addiction to internet, the boresome during the confinement and the attractive prices and stuffs on those e-store.. Nabeh.. Why am i borned a woman ?? But I have no regret being a woman.. ask me the next life i still wan to be woman.. goddess can ar ?? wahahahaha.....

Just a typical mom, I now spend most of my moolah on my kids.. *shoulder heavier* hahaha... The hubby often scold me for being so spendriff (did i spell it rite again ? watever lah) and i will normally say I got no money when he ask me.. hahaha.. He is not those hubby that gif monthly expenses to the wifey.. tell me how many men now that actually gif monthly expenses to the wifey if the wifey is working.. if you are the lucky one.. i CONGRATS you.. you had found a very good hubby.. In our household, I pay for my kid's babysitter while the hubby wud pay for the diaper, the milk for my prince and the bills plus sometimes the meals.. Whn i spent all money, i wud ask the hubby for money.. hahaha.. cheeky one !! but sometimes he wud also made me pay for something .. like his duty free ciggie and some shopping groceries.. We are lucky that we dun need to worry about our meal whn MIL is around.. cos she will be incharge of all the expenses on meals.. while SIL will take charge of the water bill and sometimes she wud shop for the household items like the washing detergent, toilet rolls and etc..

Well, I mayb considered the lucky one that dun need to spend much huh... hahaha.. but yet i m still not able to save a single cent.. shame on me !! shame shame.. While i very much want to send some $$ home to my parent.. I am struggling and still struggling waiting for the time whn i can do it.. BUt I wud normally pay for mom's medication when it's time to collect her medication.. she wud normally wanting to gif me back the money.. CHoiy.. if i really take i mai damn char siew ??? and the only thing that i can do is to pay for the monthly YESTRO for my mom cos that's the only "entertainment" for her as she have to stay home all the time.. and wud change the new notes for CNY's angpow...

the more i type the more my shoulder ache tim !!.. hahaha... luckily, i got the "tin tit lok lui tong pei kum" attitude from dad.. but unfortunately, i din got the thriffty attitude from mom.. WHY !!! ?? perhaps i shud.. when ?? till the day i die !!.... wahahahahahaha.... Luckily, the hubby is thriffy.. but.. he wud save his $$ at the end HAVE to use it at one shot !!! hahaha....

wat to do ... tht's life lor.. keep on shoulder aching till died do us part.. can i hv a massage chair pls.. OGAba.. hehehe...

blood is thicker

2009-04-02T12:04:00.000+08:00

MIL has been asking me to keep away this 3 tatty teddy from my bed cos it creates dust .. and I WOULDN'T.. cos it has got meaning for me..

The tatty in REd loves me alot and no matter what she is there to love me.. while the tatty in BLUE is always there for me and whenever i need a pair of ears to listen. And the weeping tatty.. just cant do much but weep in between tatty BLUE and tatty REd lor..

many times weeping tatty wud run to blue tatty cos red tatty is too scary and words she said that is so hurtful.. of cos blue tatty loves both weeping tatty and red tatty.. but sometimes.. there's a limit to every patient (did i put it rite ?? ~ watever )

today, mami tatty called weeping tatty.. she said.. " haizh.. sometimes think of red tatty, she is really a pity.. no matter what u send her your regards and ask how is she lah .. u know she is a very tempermental person.. never think b4 she say anything.. As long as u do your part caring for her lah.. even if she dun appreciate or thinks it's bullshit oso nevermind.. you do your part .. she also very sayang both of you geh.. just she very explosive only.. ... " and weeping tatty just said.. "ng". mami tatty once told weeping tatty " red tatty couldn't listen to ppl's advice.. one day i wud write her a letter and tell her. " weeping tatty hopes red tatty wud understand ler.. and stop putting blames and thinks that everyone oso wan her to die ler.. Everything happens for a reason.. chinese saying "If we dont have such big breast, we dont wear a big bra" :P

weeping tatty told mami tatty "lucky u now change alot.. will LET GO liao.. otherwise.. haizh .. i oso lari.. .. u mai used to be "fire-cracker" last time now no more fire liao.. think she will change whn she reached your age bah" and both weeping and mami tatty Laugh out Loud..

10 years

2009-03-29T21:54:00.000+08:00

Just the other I was online chatting with an old fren, a mother of 2 and now she is separated from the kiddo and the hubby cos she need to stay here to earn money. She is the now the breadwinner for her family cos the hubby is starting up a business..

She asked me a question " Jan, Have you ever regretted married to your hubby? or Do you think you married the rite guy ? " ... ah ?? i oso confused liao which was the question.. but my answer was " b4 i married him i tot i did, but after he betrayed me i think i didn't but now it's all too late cos of the kiddo "

Later that nite, while the hubby was cleaning my prince I told him bout the question.. and my answer.. His respond was " WHY ?? you married the wrong guy meh?? " i said " You said leh ya.. lahh... " and i attended my princess while he continued attending my prince.. hehehe..

That's how we normally communicate.. problem there ?? hm.. i wud rather tell him the truth and "jah" him sometimes.. While he wud just keep quiet as usual lor. So I told my fren, actually my aunty said something which i think it's very true.. She told me her son said " If young that time dont earn more money, wait till old only earn meh .. if want a happy FAMILY money is the essence..no money how to make everyone happy?? " TRUE mah.. that why her son non-stop earning money.. hmph...wont go into detail there...

Today I listened to a song name "10 years" sung by Eason Chen.. and then i went to the hubby and told him.. "sudah sepuluh tahun, you know wat sepuluh tahun not?? " then he asked me wat ?? i said.. "you think lah" Actually, this coming July,31 will be our anniversary not marriage one.. but being together for 10 years.. how time flies.. my fren came to my house today and saw my picture taken whn i was in form 5.. they said.. "WAH.. that time so pretty wan ar.. wat had happened to you ?? Pin gor gau send lei gum??" hahaha.. neh .. that fellar lah .. *pointing at the hubby photo* If only I could turn back time.. Everybody wish ler.. hehehe.. will i still choose this fellar ?? or the guy that my family like... hehehe.. if compared with the guy that my family like, i rather choose back this hubby .. wahahahhaah..... give me another choice lah .. hahahahah.....

a year to remember

2009-03-19T13:06:00.000+08:00

2002, i was clearing my computer table and saw this appt card. A nite before i was thinking, how old wud it be ??? and Now i KNow.. it's been 7 years.. Everything happened so fast.. and the next day i was left alone to take care of myself. I think from that day, I have learnt that every important things in my life I wont have this man to support me.

After all these years with this man, I've got used to doing things myself and dealing my problems myself. That's why, I wud rather kick him out from the labor room.

just wanted to remember this year August 2002... the day before Merdeka..

Here we go again..

2009-01-20T16:07:00.000+08:00

Was looking back at my old pictures and was thinking how time flies ... from my honeymoon pictures, wedding pictures to my baby's pictures.. gosh !!.. and I noticed I am so worn out and so blardy fat..

Looking at the dates of the pictures taken even made me more miserable. I wasnt very slim back then.. but at least I am still youthful and young. I got married then within 3 mths I got preggie.. Carrying a water melon for almost 10 mths.. then have to start taking care of the kid.. Just when my kid could walk and my burden is lessen.. Poof !!.. I am preggie again.. and have to carry the watermelon again plus taking care of a monkey..

Now i am sitting here, imagining the cycle comes again.. I have to take care of a lil one and the big one. Now with only 1 kid I have mountains of clothing to wash and to fold and to hang. Whn I have 2.. There will be several mountains..

Imagine nightmares on the way ............................. hahahaha... but there's a chinese saying "现苦后甜" hopefully.. the sweetness will come ler.. No time to rest, no time lah ...

too much sugar

2008-12-17T10:47:00.000+08:00

Fungal Infection is something really common to women. And it's also called Yeast Infection, I start to take notes on this infection whn I got it the last time and it come regularly too especially when I dont control my diet ~~main kuat~~ wahahaha.. NO !!..

Diet, individual hygiene, and lifestyle, can all be elements that add to to the growth of vaginal area fungus. A full growth of a yeast infection can occur by eating to much sugar and Carbohydrates. By eating an excess of these two items it offers the fungus a better prospect of surviving and growing in the end leading to the full growth of the infection. The Candida fungus is assisted by high sugar levels in your body and blood.

For pregnant women, the usual cause of infection would be the altering estrogen levels during pregnancy. During maternity the body creates large amounts of estrogen and glycogen. Now glycogen will make the region more vulnerable to yeast development. According to specialists, glycogen might cause the yeast to grow quicker and even allow the fungus to stick on the walls of the vagina. Source

I think I mentioned bout me craving for sweet stuff for this pregnancy.. I would sapu the ice-cream after dinner.. and sometimes buy some bread for my tea time.. Drink lotsa MILO, Kopi "ping", Tea "ping" and etc.. hehehe... Compared to the previous pregnancy, this time I really love sweet stuffs, spicy stuffs and sour stuffs.... the last I like those salty stuffs and just plain food. Chili is a BIG NO for Ervin!!.. hahaha...

NOw that i had too much sugar and carbo... YEs I m suffering liao !!... haizh !! the itchiness, the burning sensation and the tenderness.. hahahaha... super suffering.. better get to the doctor soon.. Been applying Betnovate but still no use ( I know it's not rite to simply apply cream but for the previous cases I've been using it ... and it works wor.. I presume diff ppl , diff method bah)

Hey.. the infection will even happen to toddler and baby GIRL .. i tell you.. My fren's kiddo .. those with bb girl.. take note okay ..

How many months edi ?

2008-12-16T15:12:00.000+08:00

When ppl see me they will ask me the same question over and over again ... haizh !!.. 7 MONTHS lah .. then the answer will be.. WAHHHHHHHHHHH.. damn fast hor.. and your tummy DAMN BIG hor.. must be a boy lah .. bla bla bla..

I din realise i already in my 3rd trimester until just now i use my finger and count it !!.. hahaha... Just Hopped Into the 3rd Trimester !!.. Lotsa ppl said.. the 1st and the 3rd Trimester is the most difficult phrase !.. indeed it's TRUE..

Now i felt so much heavier, my tummy felt so cramp as if it wanna burst and my leg swollen like an elephant's leg.. gosh !.. i felt terrible lah ... before i reached my 7th month i dont think i have trouble carrying my Ervin, but now gosh.. !! I'll get backache if I carried him for too long. *sei mou*

Ystd I received and email from a fren.. Title FACT... placental stage.. I opened it !!.. OH MY GOD !!.. i swear I will not try natural birth EVER.. i quickly called the hubby but cant get him. Reached home I told him, I think u better start saving for a C-sec I am not goin on natural. he said "Natural, is cheaper mah"..

I said.. NO WAY .. did you know i watched a video today and I think the bai is really not a bai whn in the delivery ward. my godness.. imagine.. the hole opened 10 cm and the bb's head came out from there.. and wat will happen to the bai lah ?? I dont wan to risk lah .. later i wan to find another man susah !!.. wahahahaha...

BAD hor ah Jan .. nevermind, the hubby got used to me saying things like this.. It's not only the PAIN that's unbearable but the pain and damage to the bai bai wor.. I know.. the more i complaint i will be jinxed.. but i m really scared wor.. how ?? Lotsa mommies that went thru that stage told me that they never regret it.. some i do heard some regretted it wor.. and told me the pain after C-sec is more severe then natural.. I personally went thru the C-sec and i think i am still ok with the pain, just that sometimes the scar is bit ithcy for dunno wat reason..

Some ppl said, we need to wait at least 2 yrs after the C-sec to conceive again.. but haizh.. ur fren here before 2 yrs already getting another ... Why need to wait for 2 yrs cos the scar hasnt fully recovered yet and.. if we go on natural birth it would likely to stretch the scar internally.. i really hope the doctor will tell us.. IT"S NOT OKAY TO GO ON NATURAL !.. wahahaha... bad bad bad !!!..

Ache

2008-12-04T16:05:00.000+08:00

As I laid down on the bed waiting for the ultrasound.. #2 was so calm.. whn the doc came.. and put the scan on the tummy.. "GING GONG."... the head, the body, the leg, the size.. everything is okay....

Doc said.. #2 is on tummy position.. meaning.. CANT SEE AGAIN lor..

I said, you are very notty baby !!... why lah dont let mami n dadi see you ?? How to buy things ar ??? Some said the tummy looked so big, looks like gonna be a BOY.. and some said.. gonne be a GIRL.. wahahahah... Dunno lah .. as long as he/she healthy lah ...

And so, I took MC ystd and stayed home... back to office feeling so darn tired and the whole body aching.. must be too much sleep eh ... NOPE !!.. I washed my car, change the room's curtain, washed my piles of clothing, mop the floor and fold all the used plastic bags... and wash the car porch.

Gosh.. i need my sleep badly !!... no dinner for me lah ..

sale sale sale

2008-12-02T16:18:00.000+08:00

Economy Crisis.. Global Crisis.. yet I still see LOTSA LOTSA ppl shopping here at KLCC.. chinese call it "mountain people, mountain sea" 人山, 人海 .. the last Isetan member sale ... I got the hubby a cheapskit watch.. but his NO reaction mia reaction.. did pissed me or rather i already knew his reaction gonna be like that... Maybe I shud take it back and gif to my lover instead huh.. wakakakakaka..... (laughing ala MOTT)...

Last weekend there's 3 warehouse sale going on.. this daddy really chasing after it. I got a call from sasha that Sunday.. she told me got Pureen warehouse sale.. cos i told her earlier, I wanted to get some diapers for #2. At first we din want to go but since we are going to SG Wey for dinner with relatives.. might as well go and have a look lor..

I reached the place at about 4 pm.. and grabbed 2 packets of diapers at RM 24 and RM 26 each.. Winnie Pooh pacifier holder, NIe Nie pooH bottle, Shampoos, Baby Bath, Talcum powder, some clothing, Hankie, toothpaste for MSTR ERvin, some clothing. Total damage was : Rm 200+.. hehehe.. lessen then the previous time..

Din go to the other warehouse sale cos it's already 6 pm.. but we went to Babyland Ss2 to get my Prince a tricycle.. another damage cost Rm 140++.. hehehe...

Overall, I think the warehouse sale at Pureen is worth lah.. cos I got to buy the cute bottle at RM 3-4 and the pacifier holder at RM 3.. tht's something i really like.. cos it's PINk.. hehehe... DIE lor...

i dunno why ... but my instinct told me to get pink wor... we still dont know wat the sex of #2 yet wor... have to wait till Tomolo... so if tomolo the Doc tells us... Congrats... It's A BOY !!.. I might have to gif away my pink color bottle and my pink color pacifier holder lor.. uwaaaaaaaaaaaa.... kekekeke... i even wanted to buy the pink color talcum container.. hahaha... and SIL wanted to buy .. Snow White's Milk bottle.. wahahahaha...

X'mas coming... the pocket more "Lobangs"... hahahaha... might be going to Sin during X'mas. Well, not that the hubby wanted to bring me go "kai kai" cos wan to bring HIS PRINCE (okay... mine as well) Go mah ... let him see those beautiful lights... and experience the Warm celebration.. kekeke...

My fren said.. "dont you think.. Xmas is very warmth.. and cosy .. " ..i was like... -____-'''. hahaha... anyway i know lotsa ppl dont like it.. cos it's just giving.. hahaha... like CNY lor.. I dont like it SINCe year 2007.. cos i need to gif mah .. hahahahahaha....

ei.. i shud wish all ppl.. Selamat Hari Raya Aidiladha rite ?? Qurban..

wait another 2 more weeks only i say merrry lah ...

would you ?

2008-12-01T15:23:00.000+08:00

after been bitten by snake ever go near it ?? I'll NEVER trust the snake even it's a ROpe.. hahahaha...

I was talking about using the EPF fund for small investment.. altho it's not goin to be "beribu-ribu" but at least it will help to make 'some' money rather then putting there with such low interest and now it's goin be lessen by 3%... rite ??

and guess what the hubby asked me to help pay off some loan for 'his' house.. well to be exact a house for Ervin in da future..

and my answer ?? "YOu had a BAD RECORD last time.. what makes you think that I would help ?"

so he correct me saying... "sorry wor... even if you help it's belongs to your son in the future wor.. not mine wor.. "

and I said.. tht house doesnt have my name on it .. so wat's the point I help.. I would get nothing at the end... moreover, I would very much want my son to learn how to get his OWN home .. and I would tell my son.. his parent has no money ... he got to earn wat he WANT.. I wan my son to be independent..

Do I sound very bad ?? Some parent would think that they dont have it last time.. so they wont wan their kids to be the same... and they start giving.. (if can afford) but to me.. it's doesnt matter to me whether I got something or not... If ppl gif sincerely I'll take.. if i dont anything ... i work harder lor.. if work hard oso cant get... forget it lor... if not ?? sit there and whine, wail and cry meh ?? Life still goes On mah ... rite ???

THis is something I wanted to install in my kids hard drive forever...

I know sometimes looking at the disappointing face of our kid it's really heart stabbing.. Ystd when the hubby told me... when he brought Ervin out for "jalan" and Ervin saw some "gor gor" cycling and the way Ervin looked at his dad... i heard oso I felt a great pinch..

And finally the hubby bot Ervin a tricycle ystd.. and the look on Ervin face was... so.... melting.. the SMILE on his lil face. Eeven if he dont have the tricyle I belif he will be okay with it.. .. he will just be happily playing with his Truck lor...

and i really hope that he is not a demanding KIdDo.. really HOPE and PRAY

So now the question.. would you help your spouse if he had a bad record ??? hehehehe.....

WHat to BUy this time ??

2008-11-28T16:13:00.000+08:00

The first time I got preggie.. I regretted I din buy a steriliser and food warmer.. reason being.. I am stinggy ! hahahaha..

No lah.. cos I din know I will be expecting #2 so darn FAST mah.. so now.. i am in a dilemma whether to buy or not to buy.. I saw this.. lil bean sterilizer + warmer from mamaparadise and fell in love with the color.. GREEN.. hahaha.. well not becos it's green cos.. other sterilizer are Blue.. so kinda boring. ei.. how come i stopped liking BLUe..

I was thinking.. if I am getting this I can also sterilize Ervin's bottle at the same time !! hahaha.. no need that pathetic POT !! carry up n down !!

And the food warmer will really come in handy.. especially when I am thinking of breastfeeding..

Next in da list will be milk bottles.. whn i saw this starter set from mybbstore.com, I actually fell in love with it's brush.. ahahaha.. Then she told Bfree are good especially for bb who has colic.. Choy !!

NO NO No.. no need to Burp the baby.. hahaha... But this set is not cheap tho.. and #2 wont necessary like WIDE NECK Bottle.. well at least the Brother doesnt like WIDe neck tht's why .. I gave Avent away *smack me for doing that* hehehe...

after thinking of these items.. the next thing is.. How long am I going to BF ?? I wish I can BF longer cos I really wan to see a MICHELIN baby.. hahaha.. but do I have the strenght ka ?? and to BF hor.. I have to buy IcePack, Cooler Bag, Bottles and most importantly BREAST PUMP.. i still have my MANUAL Avent Breast Pump.. but Heck !!.. pumping manually hor.. really tiring and make my hand "chao gun" hahahaha...

and not forgetting I have to get some maternity BRA.. and some Nursing Pads.. wah liao !!.. Why i dun hv maternity BRa at the first place ?? bcos.. I Never Wear Bras at home lor.. hahaha.. tht's why my nan(s) are so SAGGY !.. F*** hahahaha... *sigh !!!..

on the other hand... ppl said.. if I had C-sec for the 1st time.. I am prone to have C-sec for the second time too.. Bcos.. the stiches might tear.. well, honestly, I really hope to get C-sec cos I am so scare of the pain at the bai bai.. and the post-bai bai pain + damage.. ahahah.. lotsa mom will be throwing clog at me.. hahahaha... but whn i think of the damage on the bai bai.. i felt OUCH !!.. anyway.. i m not a real woman ... or mayb i m selfish !.. hahahaha

Question : Damage to the pocket or damage on the Bai Bai ??? hahahahahaha......

Above all, I hope there are someone selling second stuffs that i need.. regret for selling the playpen last time.. but BLACK playpen.. No thank you lah .. mozzie come !!.. hahahaha...

Investment

2008-10-07T12:01:00.000+08:00

aiya.. not shares, not mutual fund or not "fu guai san chorng" lah... hahahaha.. invest in a woman, and i said ONE darling MEN... kekeke...

here's the reason why ...

It's a great fortune to invest your time in a woman, especially a good woman. If you are an experienced man, you would certainly agree with me.

Women are peculiar species. If you have succeeded in conquering her heart, she will ceaselessly sacrifice for you till the end of your life.

Just think over, you just spend a little of your time to go out for dinner with her, watch a movie or give her a simple gift, or say a few words to touch her heart or you promise her that you will bring happiness till the end of her life, or take time to help her kill some cockroaches in the kitchen, or sometimes spend some efforts helping her to carry some heavy stuff, or to open the car door for her. Continue to do all the above things and care for her well-being for 2 to 3 years to come……..

What do you get in return?

You will be amazed to find that you have a woman whom would continue to care for your well-being for the rest of your life. She will wait for you at the door steps with a naïve and sweet smile each time when you meet her (of course, you don't get the sweet smile when you are arguing with her), nevertheless, she would still prepare a warm dinner for you after the heated argument has faded away…

The greatest of all things she has done for her life, is to give birth to your child (of course, the unbearable pain need not be mentioned here)… She would continue to care and feed the child that carry your surname for many years to come no matter how naughty your child would be.

On top of that, she also does the thing you that hated the most, i.e. doing housework, washing your clothes, sleep your child and tossing alone in the bedroom waiting for you at night for your return. For some of you, you would rather spend some time drinking with your friends at the bar and telling her that you have important assignments in the office, letting her to wait for your return in the living room till the wee hours of the morning …

When you are down, she will be the first to encourage you. When you are happy, she would be the first to feel for your happiness before you open your mouth to tell her by looking at your face. When you achieve some good results at work or assignments, she feels the happiness with all her heart and pray to God to protect and bless you with more successes in the future.

Despite all the above, you repay her by asking her to talk less and tell her not to bother your work. You ask her to sleep when she wanted to spend some precious time with you sharing with some simple happenings of the day. Sometimes, you are too proud to take her out when you are out with your friends. Can you feel that the suffering that she has to endure for the next 30 years of her life staying with someone like you?

And for men, for the next 30 years, what do you do to repay her gratitude; you are only capable to continue to do what you know…….to work

Please continue to appreciate the woman of your life….

If you noticed that if there any women whom start to show some sacrifices to you, your door to the days of happiness has opened before you ….

Please grab the opportunity to share the happiness with her and help her to be the man of her dreams….

Haizh.. i dun need my man to kill cockroaches lah cos i can kill it myself.. haha.. i hate lizards but at last i had to kill it myself too.. haha.. I dont need him to open door for me lah .. Just dun open the door and invite other women that's good enuf dy !! hahahaa...

Why hor.. women always have to be the one that sacrifice geh ... haiya.. Now that i can no longer see the shape of my body i felt so horrible and miserable ar.. No longer can go out clubbing and dancing.. aiyo.. i forgot all the move dy tim.. No longer can be sexy liao (body out of shape how to be) hahahaha... If only men know how to appreciate wat the wives did for them and the family and behave.. Haizh.. it's just a sharing.. cos i found it very meaningful lor.. hahahaha...

the pregnant woman journal

2008-09-24T14:10:00.000+08:00

When I was pregnant with Ervin, I drank lotsa protein, no icy stuff, no this, no that.. but for #2 I am kinda lagging it.. I dont drink protein, I ate lotsa icy stuffs, I drank coffee, and etc..

I know I need to consume lotsa protein in order to have a healthy baby.. but I am just plain lazy .. or perhap I am taking it for granted bah..

The 1st time I was preggie, the hubby wasnt with me most of the time. I had to stayed home alone. Sometimes even eat alone. He would go out until mid nite. Yet I told myself, for the sake of the baby I have to take good care of myself.

For this 2nd pregnancy, eventho the hubby is around but it seems that I got used to taking care of myself already. Perhap accepted the fate that I am not that lucky after all. While should I be glad that Ervin is a not a sticky boy ?? Perhap. Lotsa time he will be busy doing his own business or been entertained by the grandma or SIL or even his dadi.. I would just laze around watching some TVB Drama. Some ppl said, we tend not to be so "gun cheong" for the 2nd pregnancy.. YUP !! That's me.. but sometimes I do tell my #2.. it's not that I dont care bout him.. I do love #2 but i am just plain lazy to put efforts.

You may say It's very UNFAIR to #2 !!.. but for wat I have gone thru during the 1st pregnancy.. I would say .. I surrendered !!.. I let the God do HIs job.. Some women are just so lucky.. that they dont have to go thru wat I had.. and I always know that there are also a lot of women that are more unlucky then me.. I'll just have to be contented and open-minded..

the day i went to see him

2008-09-17T12:02:00.000+08:00

Last weekend I went back to my hometown just to pay a visit to my fren who was admitted to the hospital. He was in ICU and still in ICU.. When I saw him.. He just look like a patient sleeping very soundly with some snoring... but whn I tried to wake him up or asked him to open up his eye.. he has no respond.. He isnt sleeping after all..

I kept asking him to wake up and look at me.. cos i m preggie now.. encouraging him to wake up to see a fat preggie woman.. but he doesnt gif me respond... i touched his eye and told him. this is his eye.. and he have to open it up to see me..

When my fren asked him to wake up and see me cos now my nose looked like a pig nose.. i quickly said "F*** U " and i can see he responded.. i know he really wanted to open up his eye cos i can see the eyes are moving bit.. but guess he just need more time.. looking at him in "coma" and yet so suffer i felt so heartache.. why .. ?? why must this things happened to him.. ?? He is gng to get marry next year.. we mentioned about him getting married and i can see he has respond to it.. he really wan to talk to us.. but cant..

This coming Friday is his Birthday and I really hope that he can wake up.. Again.. please god.. dont torture him like this.

chinese

2008-09-16T15:53:00.000+08:00

whenever we (chinese) face difficulties or problems, we will always look for some medium to get some advice and solutions.

I remembered when my mom was very sick last time.. some fren went to some medium to seek advice too.. and they will try to find some solution. And normally the medium will say the sick person was disturbed by "something". THen we need to perform some ritual to please the "something" so that it will go away..

I remembered my mom's fren told me that the "god" will help my mom and I will have a nitemare.. (something lidis lah).. Precisely, tht nite i dreamt bout mom jumping off from the hospital she was staying in.. also the same hospital my fren is now..

This is the reason why i dont like to go to that hospital. I told mom bout this.. and she said.. "CHOY" wahahaha.. so i said.. make sure u take good care of yourself.. i dont wan to go there anymore.. hahaha..

Today, my best fren told me that my fren (TW)'s went to seek advice from the medium. And the medium said that he's been disturbed by spirit.. They din ask further for solutions and why so they have to go again.. How careless !!!..

Of cos I do believe in these medium thingy.. however, very much i would tried to avoid it unless things gone really really bad.. SO DO YOU BELIEVE IN THIS ???

I really hope that the "god' can gif a solution and safe my fren..

Reasons

2008-09-15T14:53:00.000+08:00

The reasons why I wanted to create another blog are I wanna purify LadyDummy.blogspot.com ... hahaha.. cos ladydummy is too corrupted dy .. too many 18sx dy !!.. ahahaha... and as the result google kicked me out from being indexed... hence I am not able to do pay post !!.. hahahaha...

I think i will still maintain ladydummy when i have 18SX stuff but i will concentrate more in this new blog.. Beside purifiying ladydummy i need to purify myself.. kononnya from being to foul dy .. hahaha... aiya.. a mom for 2 lor.. if I am not gng to set a good example.. then my kids grown up to be sampat me ...

Yet.. my sampat'ness will always follow me.. so.. WELCOME TO PURE LADYDUMMY...

hope he will be fine

2008-09-13T15:03:00.000+08:00

Whn I was having problems and difficulty .. He never failed to cheer me.. He will entertain me no matter when I call him.. even in the midnite... He's been my best fren since I was Form 5.. I dont know how we can became frens but as the time pass, we eventually became very close fren... Despite the distance.. we still kept in touch by calling each other and sending text msgs..

Very often, I would ignored his forwarded sms... I am sorry .. but i know deep inside my heart that he will always be there whn i need a person to talk to or a shoulder to cry on..

You were there wanting to chat with me the day the accident were about to happen.. but as usual I took it for granted.. I wished i had chat with u ... I regretted I didnt spend sometime to chat with you.. until Saturday I received the sms saying tht you are involved in an accident.. I am sorry !!.. Please promise me that you will recover.. Please promise me that you will be fine.. i am waiting for you to recover..

Please god.. dont be so cruel to him.. please punish the person that hit him and ran away.. please dun punish him.. PLEASE........

Good Deed

2006-07-24T16:02:00.000+08:00

what does this look like to y'all ??? a school hor.. yeah ....
NO LAh .. it's not.... it a place at Jalan Jubilee..

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fusty.. but workable..
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This por por in blue is so happy and keep claping her hand whn someone comes to contribute

there are bout 27 por por there.. yes.. only por por.. according to the FIERCE Principal, if ever there is a gong gong here.. she will resigned, she dun even take care of her own dad.. why shud she take care of the others ?? hm.. then she complained about some por por kenot tahan loneliness will look for those unisex's old folks home ler... she also said tht, even some gong gong is old liao but still gatal ler..

yer... wat type of lady is tht huh.... hm... mayb she had a bad experience kut.. but.. i hv NO good feeling towards her.. she damn 9 Fierce.

What i Contribute ah ?? Pai Seah lah .. salary not out yet lah ... only a packet of Rice and 3 packets of Biscuits lah ... Boh lui lai distribute lah ..

actually ler.. those por por were given a box each for donation/contribution lor.. so u put some money in each and every box lah.. so tht they can buy something for themselves lor.. ...This trip was organised by my neighbour, Aunty.. i since got nothing to do on Sunday .. so do something lor... aunty's MIL passed away so they wanted to do some good for ppl lor.. tht is why lor.. me ?? Kaypoh ny ler...

creatures caught

2006-07-17T16:00:00.000+08:00

peep.... yeah yeah .. look !@! in relation with the earlier post on this musang sial we finally cought this barger... look at the poor thing !!.. this morning at 5 something we got him.. my LK was so happy !! he said.. tonite it gonna get it !! yay yay !! wat shall i do with it ?? hm....

i shown this to my colleague this morning, she stay at the same area as mine... she said her neighbour is feeding this animal .. and it din cause her trouble anymore, and this animal even help her to catch rat.. wat liao !! i really dun hv such patient to feed it.. let it feed me better still !! wahhhahaha.. *evil grin/laugh*

weekend continues

2006-07-17T15:59:00.000+08:00

me lou tau and his sunglass... the big 1..

some aunty say i look like me mom... ada ?? she so happy to hear tht .. !! weee...

aiya.. no more pictures lah .. dun wan to load liao .. cos uploading make me tu 9 lan... stupid geh

weekend back home

2006-07-17T15:58:00.000+08:00

last week i went back to my hometown, no need to ask.. yes !! alone, cos my LK have to stay home to fix something.. anyway.. on saturday morning, i followed my parent to a temple. mom said she's been selected to be "lou chu" i also dunno wat is tht ler.. but wat i know is she need to spend money ler.. aiya... below are some pictures taken ler..

my yau yeng lou tau.. yeah he is the malaysian "popeye the fisherman"

i have no idea how old is this temple liao.. there is a big "kuan tay" statue there...

LOOK at the BAJU... it's ridiculously BIG... as tall as the ceiling...

my mom with some aunties.. helping out ler...
got somemore baju for the "GOD" i kinda like the white color baju... happening ler...

wah... see so many offering ler.. i wonder how much polution it gonna cost.. hihihi...

owh... this is the stage for the opera show !!

Creatures attack 1

2006-07-12T15:56:00.000+08:00

Anybody know wat the hell is this creature ??? i found it in google under the MUSANG category wor.. but later found tht there are lots more species thru here

...

this creature went into my roof and make so much noise that we kenot sleep... worst still this CauHai creature go and spoilt my alarm system and trigger the alarm.. tiu !!

2 something only we slept lah .. after the lantiu animal trigger then only it satisfied and went off not making noise anymore.. MCH !! i think it back for revenge ler.. cos the nite b4 my LK spotted him and wanted to whack 9 him... but he din come down.. mahai !! it not tht stu9pid after all...

tiredness and emototo

2006-06-29T15:52:00.000+08:00

my sister left me a comment.... and all i wanna say is...

it's not easy telling problem to ppl..... especially the loved one !! I've got this kinda attitude built up from my hubby himself.. he is the kind of person tht always like to keep feeling to himself... of cos he is understanding.. and I am not complaining bout him..!!

anyway, wat i wanna say is.. diff ppl have diff ways of expressing oneself or letting their depression or tension or watsoever... and I hv choosen a quiet way.. tht 's all.. I know you guys are there and always supporting me .. Thank you !! whn i really need you.. i will come to you.. now ! i still can handle.. no Problem. !

posting in my blog is one of the way that I can express myself.. it's just like writing a diary... or shouting to the toilet bowl and get it all flush .. once you flush it.. that's it !! "gao tim !! sau gong" !

Tomolo or today or the day after.... I will still remain cheerful at the eye of other ppl... Hm ... :) like wat someone say... I am just being quiet and tired and bored not sad !! Im okay lah....

sound so bipolar and blah !!

for my son in UK

2006-06-21T15:52:00.000+08:00

my UK son

2006-06-21T15:50:00.000+08:00

Peng 9(kao) San ... this is a word that I teach my son to say .. during his stay in Malaysia.. meaning..

"Fain 9 ting".... "9" is actually pronounced in Cantonese means Cock. but wat the heck !! it's well blend izzenit peng 9 san !! I am not the 1 tht invented this word.. my Mom-In-Law did.. everytime she comes back I will hear her say .. peng 9 san... anything also peng 9 san... so she is the real peng 9 san !!

okay.. this is peng 9 san yee yee ... (my son named her tht..)

This is the PENG 9 San Pair.. (Peng Kao San "Ma Ma" and Peng Kao San "Son/Chai")

my son kei 9 yau yeng ar... so proud of him.. si bey leng chai !!

my tatoo

2006-06-09T15:47:00.000+08:00

Updated : As promised, i am goin to post my LK's tatoo for y'all to see.. u see it for urself lah .. me no eye see lah...

okay... there is stories of these tatoo.. initially, he only had a scopion tatooed on his right arm.. then, I went to Uk for 1 1/2 months.. whn i came back .. step out of the airport i saw some changed on the tatoo on his hand. so i found that there is a stupid lizard on his left arm. I really dun hv appetite to eat after tht cos he promised he wont tatoo anymore, and he said if I tatooed 1 he will tatoo 3 mah... later on... balik rumah .. i found his chest got another 1 more.. which is the stupid skull.. ma fu lat !! i damn bengang already ... i said by hook or by crooked u hv to take me to tatoo.. if not i will go myself...

as i said.. i got my tatoo at last and it was sponsored by his pet brother lah... and it cost him RM 250.00 .. izzenit nice ???? .. manatau.. i balik kampung for 1 week.. my hubby go and tatoo somemore the tribal design on his shoulder.. Fu lat him ah .... he is damn 9 crazy !!! i am thinking to get 1 more on my shoulder.. behind my back...

how ?? my tatoo nice o not ??.. later leh.. i will take pictures of my low kong's tatoo to show u all ah .... oh .. one more siao lang's tatoo to show as below.. this tatoo belongs to our cousin sister..... i m sure u all will ask if it's pain ... erm... if you wan tht thing so much u wont feel pain lor... my mom in law said she wanna get 1 too if got sponsor.... wahahaha...... my tatoo sponsored by my hubby's god brother... SOWing Kent

Lonely... I am so Lonely.. ~~ Not

2006-04-28T15:47:00.000+08:00

wawawa....... my partner went to Myanmar arh... i am goin to miss him ah ... sial !! but i too goin back to hometown and tomolo goinn to my couz place... so m not that lonely after all... i wonder wat my partner goin to buy back for me eh...

let's see.. damn hectic month for me lah .. distribute wedding card lor.. my sister's hse lor.. my registration lor.. the house warming lah .. aiyo!!! die standing lah....

her hubby called me @!!

2006-04-27T15:45:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, me best fren punya low kong called me !! well tokin bout my best fren, she is abit siao siao wan ah ... i also dunno how to say lah .. but the thing is she is goin to get marry wit her hubby and yet she is behaving like she tak kisah...

kinda hard for everyone to judge a relationship honestly.. correct o not?? it's actually depend on the person tht involved.. so I asked him some question and let him think it over.. i did not gif any solutions...

i asked if he still love her and wanted to marry her.. if yes.. it's either you change it or you change yourself lor.. since you cant change her attitude.. so ah .. change urself lor.. so that u wont be suffering that much lah .. it's either you change it or you accept it.. if kenot change then accept lor...

sometimes think about it hor.. being love is really better then loving a person in another meaning is u TAKE more then you GIVE.... ... duck.. at least not so painful mah .. correct o not??

but many sohais outside wud rather be the one that gif lor.. and sad to say i am 1 of those sohai too... :(

anyway, life is like dat wert... if you dun wan to be unhappy then you hv to make urself happy.. u are not living for other ppl lah .. dey .. u living for yourself lah .. aiyo...

so we chat on the phone for almost 1 hour +++ .. until my face mask also dried liao !! kan neh !!.. but i hope he really thought think over and decide the best lah .. wat to do ..

Seven (7) years

2006-03-10T00:53:00.000+08:00

SEVEN (7) years... being together, this is not a short period neither is a long period. A couple can go thru alot of things in this period of time. Sweet, Sour, Bitter or even Spicy ~ "tim, shuen, fu & lat".

I never think that my life will be so lucky, everything goes the way I want. NEver ! b'cos whenever I want something I will always be the last person to get it or I won't have anything at all. Just plainly pathetic !

Things happened so fast, we met and we became lover. Cohabiting for 7 years, I thought I understand him but the truth is he is unpredictable. Always in a glommy face I thought issit I haven't been treating him nice ? What can I do to make him happy ?? Is he not happy with me ?

I always envied his frens why he can laugh, smile and talk lot with them but whn he comes home, he start to be quiet and sad. There was once, I thought of leaving him and silently I rented a room but whn we confront he shows no feeling of guilt all he said was "You should gif some times for tht person to change" so finally i gif up the thought of moving out. Giving him another change to prove I m wrong. But...

Things goes so well for a couple of months and he is back to normal. Sometimes I dont understand if he really loves me or simply wanted a companion. He isn't a romantic person but to others he can be so passionate. He isn't a happy person but to others he can be so talkative.

Am I not qualified to deserve some caress, some happy smiles, some conversation and some communication from him?

Horrifying Text Message

2006-03-10T00:25:00.000+08:00

posted on 03/09/06

I wasn't suppose to be so "kay poh" and intrude his privacy, but I start suspecting something a couple of months ago.

"My Lover-I love u-Gd9" what is this suppose to mean ?? It is from a gurl named WC. Suddenly.. I felt there is a pain in my heart. After reading the text I deleted it and pretend nothing happened. As I thought it isn't a propriate time yet cos I need more time to observe, collect more informations and THINK.

What is this gurl thinking? She knows that he is getting married this year and what is she doing? I honestly don't know. There is a chinese saying "There is always another mountain higher" - "yat san wan yau yat san kou". What if this gurl is insane, she don't mind to involve in this triangle despite he is getting married? Should I continue my life with this MAn.. ??

I m in total LOST now !!